Reptilicus Silliness

Killer crocodiles and man-eating alligators, the stuff of true b-movie legend. Some of the earliest talkies had Tarzan wrestling with stuffed leather African crocodiles. These animals have a certain mystique attached to them, and although both animals have been known to snack on the occasional human, Hollywood would have you to believe their diet mainly consists of unfortunate adventurers and New York sewage maintenance workers.

Hollywood is not the only culprit when it comes to reptilian disinformation though. Some countries where large crocodiles are indigenous have turned out there fair share of animal attack movies as well.

Below are reviews of some of the weirder crocodile/alligator run amuck movies from the around the globe. Keep in mind this is not meant to be a totally inclusive piece on every killer croc and gator picture, but a highlight of some of the better (read weirder) ones.

United States

Eaten Alive

1977

Directed by: Tobe Hooper
Stars: Neville Brand, Carolyn Jones, Robert Englund

This nice little skeleton in director's Tobe Hooper's closet came just three years after his mega successful hit The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Best guess is Hooper thought lightning would strike twice with another movie loosely based on questionable facts, this time surrounding crazy Louisiana swamp trash and a pet crocodile.

A movie filled with attempted rape, sexual assault, and most importantly crocodile mauling's Eaten Alive is a basic exploitation horror film of its time. The story revolves around a swamp side hotel named the Starlight ran by crazy redneck Judd (Neville Brand) who feeds his pet crocodile people who get on his bad side.

New characters that are destined to be eaten are introduced throughout the first half of the film, with most of the supporting cast getting swallowed by the large crocodile by the end.

The crocodile attack scenes are about what you would expect from the time period and given the budget constraints of the movie. One memorable highlight features the blood thirsty crocodile busting through the porch railing to devour a hapless victim.

Although not a full fledged killer crock movie, Eaten Alive has some great animal attack sequences, definitely worth a look for exploitation and horror fans alike. Rating | ****

Crocodile

2000
Directed by: Tobe Hooper
Stars: Mark McLachlan, Caitlin Martin and Chris Solari

Look what we have here, another movie by Tobe Hooper staring a crocodile! This is a total travesty compared to Eaten Alive though. It's really pretty interesting to see such a prolific genera director turn out swill like this. This movie has some forces working against it. Like the fact it was shot on video, and released direct to DVD. Or given that most the cast is comprised of amateurs.

The plot is a thin as they come, a group of young people are out on a weekend vacation where they are stalked and picked off one by one by a large crocodile in search of its stolen eggs.

Still, there is something to like about this film even with all its flaws. At its core it's still a monster movie, something I can get behind and enjoy almost any day. The effects are all practical in camera, with an animatronic crocodile doing all the murdering. The corn ball effects leave something to be desired but fit well into a movie like this.

All things considered this film really is craptacular. Only really worth your time if you're a Hooper completest or have a hankering to watch some mechanical crocodile hi-jinks. Rating | **

Asia

Crocodile
a.k.a. Chorake
Thailand/South Korea
1979
Director: Sompote Sands
Stars: Nat Puvanai, Tany Tim and Angela Wells

The majority of this film was shot two years prior to this title being released. Additional footage was shot for overseas distribution.There are at least three known versions that made it to video in the U.S. and Europe.

The particular version reviewed here is the 1979 release Chorake known in the United States as Crocodile. I obtained this copy from a gray market DVD dealer, sourced from a Dutch PAL VHS.

This film starts off with an opening title sequence overlaid on footage of two topless Thai girls inside a giant Crocodiles mouth. The mouth is chomping up and down, though the girls never get any bloodier than they already are. Taking a close look at this opening sequence it's not clear if the giant crocodile head is mechanical or being controlled by off camera puppeteers.

What is clear is that opening sets the mood for this giant crocodile farce that's more fun to watch than a lot of its Asian croc movie counterparts. Sure it's just a rip on Jaws, but the carnage is creative and body count high enough to keep things from getting boring.

Our giant croc lives in on the ocean floor and chomps,chomps, and chomps through boats, villagers, and even urban areas. On first viewing I was a little confused as to whether there were more than one crocodile running wild. My source of confusion came from the fact that the scale of the crocodile kept changing. One scene he's demolishing small buildings and swallowing a water buffalo whole, the next he's biting a man's leg off with a head the size of a typical real crocodile. Hysterical.

Film flubs aside this is as highly entertaining movie and very recommended. Rating | ****

The White Crocodile

19XX
Indonesia

Can't tell you much about the production of this movie, I don't know who directed it or the year it was even released. What I can tell you is Indonesians love there crocodiles. So much so they were once worshiped as Gods. Although this film is in its native tongue without any subtitles, it's still wildly entertaining border lining on mind-fuck.

There's quite a bit of Indo witch craft, exorcisms where people barf up live baby crocodiles, a white rubber crocodile with a blue gem encrusted head who a woman gives birth to, a crocodile birth were the animal eats his way out of his human mother's belly. Lots of random scenes of crocodiles attacking people as well. Can't say I would recommend it, but might be fun in a party viewing. Rating | **

Europe

Big Alligator River

1979
Director: Sergio Martino
Stars: Barbara Bach, Claudio Cassinelli and Mel Ferrer

Like most of the other Italian Jaws rip offs Big Alligator River owes a lot of key plot points to Spielberg's original. That's not to say this movie is a carbon copy with an alligator instead of shark though.

A photographer is hired by an international business man to take pictures of his soon to be opened resort in Africa. The resort is mostly staffed by locals who believe the presence of white men on the sacred riverbank has angered an alligator God who is eating the workers.

As in Jaws, our hero tries to persuade the owner to postpone the opening of the resort. This is where things take a left turn and get original. The local people angered by the eating of their own decide to kill everyone with a white face! It all climaxes with the surviving foreigners stuck on a boat in between an Island of angry locals and a giant alligator trying to cap side there boat.

The alligator attack scenes are your typical alligator thrashing in the water inter-cut with people thrashing in the water, and then a scene of red water. Not exactly ground breaking visual effects, but the norm for the time.

Entertaining, if not a little more original than your typical Italian rip off. Rating | ***

Killer Crocodile 2

Director: Giannetto De Rossi
Stars: Richard Anthony Crenna, Debra Karr and Ennio Girolami

Also from Italy Killer Crocodile 2 is a sequel to, you guessed it "Killer Crocodile". Really not much use in tracking down the first one because part two has the exact same story line, actors, and even some recycled footage from part one.

What we have here is yet another Jaws rip off staring a really big crocodile. Although the same set pieces and props are used from the first film I consider this one better.

On one of the opening scenes the crocodile is stalking a couple of boat loads of singing choir boys and nuns. Just when you think some circumstance will happen to save them they get attacked. That's right, the unspoken code of horror movies is broken and the viewer is treated to small kids and nuns being gorged on by the large reptile. Out of all the rubber prop crocodiles used in the movies reviewed here, this movie's seems the most monstrous.

All in all a good film, harder to find but totally worth the search. Rating | ****

Further Viewing:
Alligator (1980 USA)
Alligator II:The Mutation (1991 USA)
Supercroc (2007 USA)
Lake Placid (1999 USA)
KraiThong aka The Legend of the Crocodile (2001 Thailand)
Chalawan - Krai Thong 2 (2005 Thailand)
Crocodile Evil (198X Hong Kong)
Crocodile (1996 Korea)
Killer Crocodile (1999 Italy)
Crocodile 2: Death Swamp (2002 USA)

La Bonzesse (1974 France) [the movie the feature screen cap is from]